WEIRD CONTEMPORARY FABLES
By: ALVIN FIXLER

COCKROACH

A Madagascan hissing cockroach named Pico developed a bad case of laryngitis and instead of hissing, he started alternatively rattling, whistling, clicking and groaning.

The other hissing cockroaches called a meeting and formally informed Pico that their species have to hiss, and if he didn’t, he would be thrown out of the HCA (Hissing Cockroaches Association). Pico didn’t know what to do until a friend took him aside and showed him an ad in the newspaper. The ad was for a physician named Revin who specialized in hiss restoration for Madagascan cockroaches. The doctor operated on Pico and eliminated the rattling, whistling, clicking and groaning. Revin was actually a toucan.

Pico was happy about the surgery and paid the doctor for what seemed to be a very successful operation; he was, however, warned that there might be some side effects. Pico eagerly went out into the jungle looking forward to start hissing again. But, alas, poor Pico ... when he tried to hiss nothing but a scream came out of him.